“See you in Heaven”
UPDATE: my mother passed away peacefully on June 4th, 2012. This blog describes my last encounter with her in human form, though she has visited me several times since, taking the form of a hummingbird, my favorite bird.
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My dear mother has had a debilitation disease for almost 2 decades now, and it is finally at the end of its cycle, taking all of her physical abilities and almost all of her mental capacities.
My Aunt called me to let me know that she is at the end of her life line, and it may be a good thing to visit with her, before she transitions from this life.
My mom is in a nursing home in New Jersey, across the country from my home in Los Angeles. Due to the fact that I’m a single mom with 5 children, I knew that it was going to take a lot of faith and Divine manifestation to get over there for a visit.
After a week or so, once I let go of the frustration and anxiety, and let God, I received the $$ from family for the round-trip flight, and a few good friends volunteered to care for my precious children while I was away.
So I was off.
Haven’t seen my mom in 3 years, and was choked up inside and out when I first saw her in her current condition. Even with the preparation from my family, I was not ready to see my mom in a body that no longer works for her. I was not ready to see how she aged in every way, shape and form, and had very little spark or hope in her eyes, which was closed most of the time.
I tried to converse with her about many things, including updates of her grandchildren and me, and it felt like I was speaking to a brick wall. It was frustrating, at first. Then I lightened up, and was just with her. Holding her hand, hugging her, loving her.
We took a stroll (in her wheelchair) in the nursing home’s garden, where we heard birds sing and saw many lovely plants and trees. She hasn’t felt sun or fresh air in a long time, and I could feel her spirits lift. Even asked her questions about our surroundings, and she answered in one syllable answers, letting me know she was present.
My last day with her, ran into a musician who was on her way to put on a performance for the residents. Asked my mom if she wanted to hear some music, and she enthusiastically (very rare) nodded her head yes. So we went, and she moved in spirit to the rhythm, and her eyes were opened more than ever. I even danced with her arms, and sang to her (even though she has always told me that she did not like to hear me sing, I didn’t care!).
The most special thing was all the smiles I received from her, which my Aunt told me was rare, and very special. Indeed.
After the concert (well, sort of), I painted her nails with a lovely rose color, washed her crusty face and brushed her beautiful silver gray hair. When I left, she actually looked much better!
Had a few minutes alone with her before I departed, and I thanked her for being such a loving supportive mother. I surrounded her with love and light, and massaged her body with healing energy, and then informed her that:
“I will see you again in Heaven. Just let go and let God. You are in good hands, and greatly loved.”
Hugged her one more time, kissed her on the lips… and left her in peace.
That is a beautiful and articulate description of your time with your mother.
What a delightful and insightful story, Wendy Sue. I could feel your mother’s love coming through your words. I have long felt like those who hang on for many years in a condition that seems to us to be an empty shell are really returning to the innocence, teachability and dependence of early childhood. They are, in fact, becoming like little children, an act many spiritual traditions teach is the only or best route to reunion with Spirit that is all of our ultimate goals.
Peace be upon you and your mother and your family. You are clearly all sustained by the common thread of Unconditional Love that is at the very heart of true existence.
What a beautiful depicition of love and forgiveness. You were truely the hands and feet of God showing even a simple demonstration of His love. I know your mother was deeply touched, as I am sure you have been. When we surrender to His love we are capable of such tenderness. He is so proud of you Wendy! (me too, what an example you are to al of us.)
Wendy, I read your story and had to tell you that I choked up because that is how my last years with Peg (my mom) went. You may not know but she had a brain tumor which was removed and she did really well…she had some social filter issues (or so that is what WE blamed her sassiness on)…not the fact that she EARNED the right to snip at people in her 84 years! 🙂 The brain tumor was never to return again but alas, it did. The doctors said you can leave it and she will die a painful death OR you can remove it and she may die of heart failure. Well, as you know, the last thing you want is anyone you love to be in pain, so we opted for the removal…and she was fine, but then had a stroke. Left her with little to no ability to speak, no walking, just eye movements, and maybe some finger pointing here and there….(final gesture of bossiness!!). It was so painful to see her live like this and she did, for 3 years!
As you know though, this past September she died. I was right there with her playing her favorite Frank Sinatra and telling her how much I (we) loved her and what a wonderful mother she was to all of us. We told her to let go and she finally did. It was sooo peaceful. I will pray that your wonderful Sunny has a beautiful passing.
Thanks for sharing your story Wendy. You are a good daughter. xo
You gave your mother a beautiful send-off. It’s so good that you brought her music. I’m sure she was well aware of you and the gift of being a loving daughter.