After indulging in another “Chicken Soup For The Soul,” I realized that I have my own inspirational reading, that is all over cyber-land! So I’ve listed it here for you, to enjoy and hopefully, to be inspired.
Please let me know if you have any comments, thoughts, concerns, alliances with any of my blogs below, and thank you for your interest and friendship!
Million Mamas Movement:
Motherhood Later:
Help! This planet is spinning out of control…
So what is happening here? It’s becoming crazier and truly insane out there.
Unfortunately, this does not shock me, though it hurts me in a deep way, especially with a tribe of five to raise in this chaotic unsafe environment.
We are looking at shifts of energy all around us. For example, look at all the hatred and racism spitting out of the Republican Presidential candidate, as if we are a part of a rated B reality show when it comes to voting in the leader of the Free World. WHAT?!
Then look at Orlando, and the way Baptists actually protested at one of the victim’s funeral?! And the killer was born and raised in a Christian nation, as a New Yorker, so he felt great shame for having gay tendencies. I’ve met so many gay people who hated themselves because of religious doctrine and non-acceptance.
Just to reveal how deep this goes, I posted an article about how the Pope suggested that Catholics apologize for the way they treat gays (after Orlando, of course), and one Christian woman posted that she will not do so, as the Bible states that it is an abomination, so therefore, there is no questioning a book that is 2 K years old with many humans editing it over the years. My response was if Jesus came back and said the same thing, to love one another, including gays, she would still defend the bible. Tunnel vision has led us here, my friend!
Now we have a Rodney King level of chaos around us, and it is all wrong. It all effing sucks! No one should be killed, ever. Guns are everywhere and we are in danger as a nation, as a planet.
This is where my faith comes in, once again. It led me out of Skid Row with my tribe of five when their father threw me out on the street, to now. I know there is a Higher Source of Love. Some call this Source, God. But unfortunately, the name God has too much baggage. So for me, the Higher Source is LOVE. We need to pray, to love, and to let go of our own prejudices and anything that stands in the way of loving our human family, regardless of their skin color, their nationality, their religion, their sexual preference, etc. We are all here as a gift from the Source, and we are here to share the Source’s love. Not hate!
It really is in our hands now. As Gandhi states, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
My dear friend,
I AM honored to share my article in April 2015’s edition of the much loved Los Angeles “Whole Person” Magazine, which offers monthly tools and events for readers to excavate, elevate, illuminate & LOVE!
A great synchronicity here is that one of my clients, Malcom Carter, is producing an indie documentary on Nassim Haramein, that handsome brilliant man on the cover, called “The Connected Universe“!
Enjoy and celebrate the Yin-Yang of Receiving-Giving! I welcome and encourage and and all comments and feedback here. Thank you for YOU!
EPSON scanner image
EPSON scanner image
EPSON scanner image
When I was hired to do marketing (and whatever else needed to get done) for the start-up of Match.Com, everyone was running around like a chicken with its head cut off! With my last corporate job, we had weeks of sales training and such. Not here!
As I was trying to make heads and tails of it all, Chris Butz, tall, handsome and debonair, took me by the hand and calmly guided me to the lobby, away from the craziness. Here, he brought a large piece of computer paper and a pencil, and started drawing and mapping out this mysterious thing called the Internet, how it all worked, how it was all connected, and how powerful it was going to be once people logged in.
Chris had this intensity about him, as do I, which allowed us to bond quickly, and, well, intensely. After this illuminating lesson, I felt confident and impassioned to join the craze!
One of the greatest compliments in my life came from Chris. We were just hanging out in South Park, a lovely park lined with cafés and restaurants next to our office, and he looked me in the eye and remarked, “Wendy, I am truly impressed by how much you’ve been able to do with marketing and outreach, with so little money.” I believe they call this “guerrilla marketing” and yes, I did learn how to stretch, and how to partner as more of a barter. This learning came in very handy after Match, up to now.
We also both lived in North Beach, and we had some fun together there, as well. One of my favorite memories was when he took me to my first (and last) Hot Yoga class. Chris was so poised and even sweated in style. I was, on the other hand, hot and bothered! Afterwards, we went to a health food store for wheat grass shots (which then bothered my stomach!), and then to my home, where we climbed to the roof and watched an airplane show. Yes, an unforgettable day with an unforgettable man. And from what I gather, he was also quite a ladies man, too!
EPSON scanner image
Chris’ mother, RoseMarie, has a funny story to share here:
Chris was a very modest person who would much rather help others than draw attention to himself. Early in his employment at Match, he was approached by someone in the organization, asking him if he would like to have his picture be one of the images that would be used in the Match.Com promotions. Although he was flattered, his modesty took over and Chris immediately refused.
A couple of weeks later, Chris’ brother, Greg, was on a business trip to San Francisco and had dinner with Chris. He was surprised to see that Chris had shaved his head and was totally bald. Bald heads were not a style trend at this time. When Greg asked why he had shaved his head, Chris replied, “I knew if I shaved my heard, they would no longer ask me to be one of the images in the new marketing promotion program.” That was Chris!
One of his closest friends, Simon, shared with me how he and Chris explored classical music and scotch. They listed to Olivier Messiaen, which is a sort of rock n’ roll of classical music.
As we celebrate Match.Com’s 20th Anniversary, I also celebrate Chris Butz, who has transitioned from his quintessential human form way too early. On April 26th, just 5 days after Match’s 20th year anniversary, was Chris’ 17th year anniversary of his passing.
I love you, Chris, and you will always be in my heart. xoxo
The original Match.Com Team at our 20 year Anniversary Reunion
It’s hard to believe that two decades ago, me and about a dozen or so others, launched Match.Com onto the internet in a San Francisco basement. I am truly honored to be a part of a new global dating paradigm and of one of the first online communities, or what we now call “social media.”
I had moved from Boston to San Francisco with Entertainment Publications, a publishing company. So when I started at Match, I literally knew nothing about this new medium except that it held great potential. Did I mention “potential” is one of my middle names?! I think that holds true for all of us creative entrepreneurs.
I can’t believe that twenty years ago, my colleague and good friend, Chris Butz, sat me down with a large piece of paper and mapped out this Internet thingy for me, drawing and laying out how it is all connected and how powerful it is, especially once more people get online.
Chris Butz, my Guide and Friend
My father reprimanded me out loud, “Wendy, have you gone California crazy?! Why would you leave a well-paying corporate job for a start-up that is giving you half the pay?” At this time, very few had heard about the Internet, and I agree, it sounded crazy. Fortunately, I was single and adventurous at the time, so I went for the impractical ride! And it was, by far, one of the best decisions of my life (and for those who know me, I also made many misguided decisions along the way!)
As for my role, I wore many hats, which is a part of the fabulous fun and hard work required of a start-up. I was doing marketing, business development, promotions, event management, and even PR before Trish McDermott joined us. Come by and see some of my work by clicking here!
Some of my favorite early memories from back in the day, was our intimate team meetings, where we all sat Indian style on the floor, with Gary Kremen, the Founder and our Fearless Leader, or Fran Maier, the Co-Founder and General Manager, leading the meetings. With no conference rooms or expensive tables and chairs in our cozy basement, we really bonded as family, and the deep desire to succeed wasn’t just about the usual financial potential, but it came from the heart. And isn’t that the best way to launch the largest matchmaking service on the planet?! I’m actually quoting the “Guinness Book of World Records” who state this as a fact! Really!!
One of my all-time favorite memories of Match was when we had a news reporter at the office, interviewing Gary. He was sitting down, again, Indian style, with his hands on his knees like a yogi, and with his tie die T-shirt on (see picture below). She asked him, “What gave you the idea to launch Match.Com?”
“I want to bring love to the planet!”
And so he did!
Gary Kremen in his favorite tie die shirt in our Match office
One of our Match.Com outreach events soon after launch
There were so many memories, learnings and new experiences that I can honestly write a book of my 1 ½ years at Match.Com. This may be a possibility, though my last book took me 3 years to write, so I am not so focused on this for now.
In the meantime, we had a most amazing 20 year reunion celebration back in San Francisco, which was not only heart-warming to see my Match family again, but also allowed me to ask a few of them some questions for this blog.
What was one of your biggest business learnings from launching the first online matchmaking service on to the Internet?
Gary Kremen: The important of distribution channel, customer acquisition cost and brand. On a personal level, I learned to stay humble and hungry and prove myself every day.
Fran Maier: We were in a new business, “online dating”, which was a rite of passage with no real default in place. It was more like “dating in the wild”! It was important to have a target market and to learn how to interact with them with integrity. For us, this market was appealing to women, which meant that we had to build our reputation up in order to build this network.
Trish McDermott: When I was coaching the CEO, Gary Kremen, with media training, I tried to get him to fit into a box. What I realized soon after was that Gary was already perfect as he was, as he was genuine and he shot from the hip. My big learning here was that passion is better than perfection!
As we reminisced about the early days of Match.Com, several vibrant memories came forth. Like for me, with the Outreach hat on, I had so many people say to me in astonishment, “Why would I meet a partner through a computer? I can just go to a friend’s party or a bar!”
Fran remembered one couple who came to our office, a successful match, and they were in their 70’s. He was a sailor from World War II! That was definitely out of our demographic. They were so happy to have found one another, and we had constant reminders of what a good job we were doing as our success database grew exponentially!
Trish and I had a good laugh at the reunion party when she recalled how we were taking pictures of Match.Com members at one of our parties, and then uploading it to their profile (no cell phone yet!). A reporter came up to Trish and remarked, “You are crazy, who is going to put their photo up?” Lot’s of LOL’s!
And now Match’s success has led to over 1 million babies! We’ve not only brought love to the planet, but we’ve contributed to a whole new generation.
If you have a Match story to share, please do so in my commentary section below, and thank you so much for stopping by!
A few years back, as I was tweeting away about the ups and downs of being a single parent, Cyma Shapiro approached me and complimented my sincere posts. Then she honored me with the invitation to write for her mid-life mothering / parenting blog called Mothering in the Middle. Since I love to write, as it helps me put my thoughts and heart together as an outlet of expression, I accepted her offer enthusiastically. Little did I know what I was getting myself into, as not only have I published some impassioned meaningful blog posts, but Cyma chose one of her favorite blogs of mine to be placed in her published anthology called, “The Zen of Midlife Mothering“! I’m now officially published. On top of all that, Cyma has become a good friend and colleague, and I am so grateful to her for her passion to bring us midlife parents together, where we have a safe place to share our joys and our troubles. She was even interviewed in an article on CNN recently, giving Cyma the credit she so deserves, as she serves so many.
On this note, please bookmark this page, or at least come back when you have a little more time, or sit back and enjoy right now! Here is a list of the blog articles that I’ve written for “Mothering in the Middle” since 2013. Please let me know below if you have any comments, thoughts or points of discussion on any of these blog posts. Look forward to hearing from you!
1. My Post-Valentine’s blog, “Love Thy Children, Love the World“, describing how we can spread the love to the world through the unconditional love that a mother feels for her child.
2. “How ‘Merry Christmas’ Upset Me (And How I Got Over It).” Fascinating read for all to see another perspective of holiday bewilderment!
9. I’m asked over and over again, “How do you do it?!” Here’s how: “Unconditional Love and Gratitude Make Mothering Oh, So Much Easier!”
10. Summer time is definitely overwhelm time for this single mom. Read how I created a “Summer with grand expenses without grand expense!”
11. Seasons Change and So Do WE! Go with the flow, my friend.
12. The Holidays are here! Are we focused on Presents or Presence?!
My favorite part of social media is the fact that we, the people, own it. With other mass mediums, we were the “con”sumer, sitting back and taking in whatever the media powerhouses had for us. Today, we are the “pro”sumers, and we can create our own media to share, as well as develop relationships with like-minded people with no geographic limitation. It is exciting times, indeed.
What holds true for our face-to-face relationships, also holds true in social media. And so I offer these tips to you for both, but mostly, for you to truly enjoy your life and live longer, healthier, more prosperously.
TIP #1: Feel genuine happiness for someone who has accomplished something noteworthy.
Sounds easy, doesn’t it? Of course, why not, right?
Here’s a perfect quote to help me make my point here:
Envy is a symptom of lack of appreciation of our own uniqueness and self-worth. Each of us has something to give that no one else has. ~Elizabeth O’Connor
Let me share a recent story with you. I’m shopping at a local store, and run into a neighborhood friend, let’s call her Susan. Now Susan met me when I was escaping homelessness with my kids, and I had sent my son to her lovely home day care center for a year.
We hug one another, as always, and she asks me what’s been going on. Since I had finally published my inspirational memoir eBook, I excitedly share with her this news. Susan’s mouth dropped, and she straight out exclaims, “Oh my, Wendy. I can’t believe you published a book while running your own business and raising 5 kids. I really feel bad now.”
That was NOT the response I had expected, but at least she was honest. Susan has a lot to be grateful for, as she is working full-time on her home business, raising her two sons and cultivating her relationship with her husband of 20 years. My point is, that we all have our gifts, we all have our calling, and we all have our accomplishments.
Why then, should my success make her feel bad? Do you ever experience this type of envy, as well? If so, then drop it! Bless the person who is doing notable things, and focus on all the praiseworthy things you are doing, or planning to do!
TIP #2: Look at bad mistakes made as learning experiences for growth and transformation.
Thank God we are not perfect! I read a great tweet recently how our imperfections allow us to learn and grow, become better people. If we were all perfect, then what would be the point?!
Since we can all agree that we are not perfect, then we can all agree that imperfection leads to making errors. We make mistakes. Sometimes we can band aid it up for a minute, sometimes we can’t. Sometimes our choices lead to great challenges. But the greater the challenge, the more opportunity to grow stronger, more resilient.
OR, we can do what most of us choose to do, and feel REGRET. What’s the point of that? Don’t we have enough problems than to add regret to the mix?!
My cousin who read a synopsis of my eBook memoir asked me if I had regret, and if I could go back in time, would I do things differently? A lot of people live in this mindset of wishing they could join Cher with her song, “If I could turn back time”…
First of all, we can’t. And even if there was a time machine to do so, would you want to? I would most definitely not. As the mistakes I made led me to be the ‘me’ that I am today. And I’ve made some MAJOR mistakes!
For just today, or for this week, look at your past as tremendous learning’s and if you feel regret, take that debilitating emotion and transform it to how you can now do better in the future. Then soar forward, my friend!
TIP #3: Look at your glass as always half full and remain receptive for more blessings.
“My Cup Runneth Over” and it really does, have you noticed? Just take a minute to think of the blessings all around you. Start with your health. If you are reading this, then you are alive, you are breathing. How about family and friends? How about a roof over your head, a car to drive in, a delicious dinner to look forward to…
Yet we live in this lack mentality, that our glass is always half empty, and nothing fills us up. And nothing ever will if we focus on lack instead of the plenty. We are so blessed beyond measure. It’s when we feel gratitude for all that we do have, that we will see how our cup is truly runneth over and over again. Get those paper towels, your cup is spilling! 😉
Try this today, or for the full week. See abundance, not lack. And then share it!
TIP #4: Give from the heart just because, without the requirement to receive something back in return.
Again, this sounds so much simpler than it really is to do. This is not because we are selfish people or that we don’t like to give to others. No, not at all. It’s mostly because we are in a culture that lives by this tit for tat mentality. I catch myself doing it, now that I practice mindfulness around this topic.
Imagine this as another Golden Rule ~ it’s as prevalent as gravity. When you drop a book, it falls. When you give from the heart, you open yourself up for blessings. It may not be from the same person you gave to, most likely, it won’t be. But it will come to you, just surrender any expectations and be aware when it arrives in your lap.
This personal example is funny to me, because it actually makes dollars and sense! I received an extra $20 bill from a supermarket when I requested for cash back. As a single mom in tight financial quarters, I almost took it. But that is not my path, and I know it is not mine. So I returned it to the stunned cashier and went about my day.
Within the same week, I received a check in the mail from the state of CA for $21! It was out of the blue, and I still don’t know why it was sent to me. Check it out, I earned $1 interest, not bad! My other stories are not so methodical, but I know without doubt, when we give from the heart, the blessings will pour in…
I even started a Facebook group called “The Blessing Exchange” to share our blessings with one another. Come on by and share and care!
So grateful to you, for your time and friendship. Please feel free to comment below on your impressions here.
Big hugs to you,
Wendy Sue
What amazing times we live in today!
We have such a Divine opportunity to reach out, to meet, to greet people from all over the planet. No geographical boundaries here! Yes, we are in remarkable times indeed.
However, unlike any mass medium we have today, we the people are actually an active part of this growing space. Unlike before, with film, radio, TV, where we would sit back and “CON”sume the media that was given to us, now we are “PRO”sumers, and making the SMW (Social Media World) what we want it to be!
We are in the driver’s seat here, my friend!
Since social media has become a global digital community, we must remember first and foremost the Golden Rule that applies to all people that we are in relation with. With this in your heart, the rest will be so much easier:
“One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself.”
TIP #1 ~ Give thanks & gratitude generously, to anyone who you inspires you, to anyone whose posts you share, to anyone who you feel grateful for. Period! Share the gratitude, there’s always more to go around, and it will definitely come your way. Promise!
It will truly benefit you to give credit where credit is due, instead of stealing someone’s worth for your own. Anyone can copy and paste, and in school, they call that plagiarism. It’s really no different here.
A Twitter example for you. I posted a fabulous business success quote from a business leader, and I found the exact quote, copy and pasted into one of my follower’s tweets! Maybe he didn’t know any better, or maybe he did, but on Twitter, retweets are one of the greatest WOM (Word of Mouth) gifts of gratitude that you can give to someone. So instead of taking it as his own, he should have done a “RT @WendySueNoah – amazing quote here”. This would have given him the same content AND would have appropriately thanked me for using one of my tweets.
And now to practice what I preach here, I’d like to sincerely thank you for taking the time to read this blog and for your interest in being a good SM citizen!
TIP #2 ~ Offer value to others. In other words, instead of the very outdated 80’s ME generation WIIFM (What’s In It For Me), try the conscientious compassionate WIIFY (What’s In It For YOU). Again, interact this way and see how others engage you in the same way!
Whether you call it karma or “what goes around comes around”, it really works like this.
On Twitter, my profile text starts off with, “How can I serve YOU?” This may sound a little strange to many, maybe even come off as a way to push my services. Yet, I really mean it. Like here I am, to serve you. How can I do so? Let me know.
When I come from that place, then my clients know, without question, that I am on their side, first and foremost. And new clients get my sincerity to serve them from a heart space, not a “pay my rent” space.
Recently, I received a tweet from a new follower that was so sincere, in which she actually visited my website to find out who I am beyond my Twitter profile, that I met her for lunch and have found a forever friend, possible future collaborator.
The power of love extends through our hearts, whether it is in the RW (Real World) or in the SMW (Social Media World) .
TIP #3 ~ Share accolades, complements & congrats! frequently, with smile icons to boot! I actually prefer hearts, which is why it is a part of my logo, as seen above. Why not liven up boring text?! 😉
Let’s take this tip to the RW. When someone smiles at you, isn’t that an immediate lift of mood? Even better, when someone compliments you, doesn’t that make you feel great inside?!
I’m not talking about insincerity here. If you do not have something nice to say, or feel a smile in your heart, don’t fake it. Fake comes through in the RW the same as in SMW.
However, if one of your social media friends posts something that they are proud of, like publishing a new book or blog, or receiving a promotion or losing 10 pounds or whatever, well, take a moment and send a “congrats!” message.
This can be as easy as clicking “like” on Facebook, or clicking “favorite” on Twitter, which will bookmark it for you as a reminder to respond, when you have the time to do so.
On a personal level, I find it hard to understand why it seems so difficult for people to share in the abundance of someone’s good news. I wonder, is it because they are jealous, or just too caught up with their own stuff?
Here’s a quote I tweeted a few days ago, and it was retweeted several times, so it hit a chord. Maybe this may provide some perspective here:
“Comparison is the thief of joy” ~ Dwight Edwards #BeYourself
TIP #4 ~ Respond when someone speaks to you! Even if you are too busy to respond at the moment (one of the benefits of social media), or maybe you aren’t sure HOW to respond, make a mental or physical note to return later and… RESPOND!
When someone takes the time to engage with you, engage back. Same as in the RW, right?
And remember, it is OK to agree to disagree. Actually, through the SMW, people’s opinions and feelings are more transparent. You can have coffee with a friend for years, talking about your lives, but did you know that they support gay marriage, for example?
They didn’t change, they are still the same person you like, right? It’s OK for us to have different views, that’s what makes the world go round. Actually, I see this as a HUGE benefit to the SMW, because it allows us to get out of our narrow life in order to expand our horizons and to open up to other races, cultures, religions, beliefs, etc., etc.!! Believe me, that is a good thing. 🙂
So, instead of unfriending a friend on Facebook because you do not agree with their politics or religious beliefs, you can practice tolerance for another’s beliefs. You would want that same respect ~ Golden Rule here!
For me, I follow some conservative right wingers on Twitter, so to get their perspective on things, since I am a love, peace and harmony left winger. Helps me to learn more, open up my understanding more.
TIP #5 ~ Think & breathe before you type AND post!
If you are in a bad mood, or feeling angry toward someone or something, take a walk. Do yoga. Meditate. Hit a pillow. Do NOT post!
Same goes for if you are feeling extra expressive due to some alcoholic persuasion, do not post! I would even recommend removing your keyboard so that you do not get tempted.
It’s much easier to release frustration or rage behind a computer, which is why we must be extra careful here.
Once we post, it’s on the Internet forever. We can’t take it away. We can delete it later, but those who’ve already read it, well, they read it.
Bottom line. Treat others with the same dignity and respect that you’d like to be treated with, and see how we can create a SMW with love, peace and harmony.
Yes, I do believe it can be so. ‘Cause it is what we all really want for ourselves, therefore, we want it for each other.
Now let’s go out there and be that Outstanding Global Social Media Citizen!
Let’s bring in Peace on Social Media Earth <3
I read this tweet a few months back, and it really hit home for me. It went something like this:
“Facebook is like having friends over in your living room. LinkedIn is like going to a Chamber of Commerce networking event. Twitter is like going to a loud party or bar.”
Yes! That is truly a realistic way to look at three of the top social mediums. If we are able to translate our real social life to our virtual social life, I believe it will help us navigate what can seem, to many, as overwhelming. The truth is, the Internet has provided us with the boundless phenomenon of connecting like-minded people on a global scale, with no geographical boundaries. Now is that astounding, or what?!
And just like in the real world, no one likes to get pushed, shoved or yelled at! I know this sounds obvious, but yet, so many are entering the social media world and doing just that.
If someone compliments you, you say, “thank you”, right? Same in the social media world! If someone retweets you, then take a moment to say, “thank you”. If someone shares one of your posts on Facebook, then give them some gratitude. Maybe even return the favor, why not? Most likely, if your tweet or post was shared, then you share something in common with this person.
Another point to consider is how you approach these different gatherings. For example, if you are attending a Chamber of Commerce networking event, you may not take off your shoes, kick back and share intimate details of your family life. Or if you are hanging out in a friend’s living room, you may want to expand upon a topic that is important to you, instead of condensing it into 140 characters! LOL
Same thing in the social media world. With tools like Hoot Suite, many people are copying and pasting the same text to be posted in several social mediums. This is the quick and easy route, but it also has the look and feel of a mass produced message instead of consciously offering something distinctive to that particular community.
Even if the message is the same, it would be well worth that diligent effort to tailor it. For example, you may place a strategic hashtag on a power phrase / word on Twitter, and you may provide more details on Facebook, for example.
It definitely takes more time and more of a conscientious effort, but for me, it is totally worth it! Social media is all about relationship building, and less like ad blasting. Relationship focused marketing = social media.
One of my favorite comparisons of the old marketing paradigm, compared to the new social media paradigm is this:
Before the Internet, we were 110% “CON”sumers. We would sit back and consume the media that was fed to us. Now, with Social Media, we are “PRO”sumers, as we have the ability to interact, to share our own ideas, and be pro-active!
Want to hear more about “Social Media with a Conscience” ~ email me at: email hidden; JavaScript is required.
Thank you for taking your time to read my blog and visit my new website!
